For the Guys: Looking Hot When It’s Cold

We love fashion – we love the trends, we love to try them, and then we love to poke fun at it. If you can’t make fun of things you love, what is the point? We’ve poked fun at women’s fashion this season, some of which we love, so we firmly believe men’s fashion is fair game. 

We’ll start with this – we’re not guys. Just want to throw that out there, in case you haven’t figured that out. However, we’ve been around for a few decades (perhaps more), and we know what a good look for a guy is. Why, you ask? Well, we’re very well-dressed women (and extremely attractive, we will add) who understand fashion and have developed our own styles; furthermore, we have curated pretty good looking, well-dressed husbands who’ve developed their own smart style senses. Sorry, we’re both off the market, in case you were wondering.

As we enter our review on men’s Fall 2016 fashion, we invite you to read [the whole post, but especially] the first few paragraphs of our personal take on women’s Fall fashion this year to understand our views on fashion. In short, we’ll sum it up with this:

  1. We’re fairly irreverent about everyday life and everyday things – even those we love – like fashion. We give honest feedback with a hearty dose of ‘potential’ sarcasm. This all depends on your point of view.
  2. Gentleman, please know what we espouse to our own followers and friends: “Fashions fade, style is eternal.” – Yves Saint Laurent. If you need a decoding on that: find a look that works for you, love that look, and go out and rock it. Who cares what is “in” because not everything that is “in” will work for you. Seek to invest in more timeless looks/pieces that you love. Don’t buy into trends simply because it’s a trend. Fashion is a fickle bitch, and she’ll turn on a dime on you. But if you’re feeling weak and decide to try every one of these trends at once, we beg you, please take a picture and send it us. Please

As ladies, we’re accustomed to seeing über thin models wearing lots of makeup and interesting hair styles come strutting down the catwalk each season. We’re equally curious why some of them look like they’re ready to kill you; we’ve decided it’s because they need to eat a few more cupcakes or cheeseburgers. Having said this, we were unprepared to see what looked like girls coming down the catwalk for male fashion, many with the same disgruntled look. Some of these dudes had more highlighting & contouring makeup than Kim Kardashian. So, note #1: If you’re wearing as much or more makeup than your female counterpart… well, she must dig it, but we’re going to go out on a limb here and say she just might be the only one. Keep her. She’s your keeper. And you clearly are hers.

So we veered away from runway fashion because it was like a proverbial train wreck of men. We didn’t want to look because it was awful, but we couldn’t turn away, either. And truth be told, unless you’re operating on a daily Cristal budget, most of us can’t afford couture runway fashion, male or female. And we gals are thinking that the average Joe is looking for a more everyday look, which turned us to the Top 10 Street Style Trends from Men’s A/W Fashion Week 2016. Since the men in our lives are more realistic, down-to-earth, outdoorsy guys, street style trends seemed a more realistic goal for the everyday man.

Achievable Street Style:

  1. Emerald Green: It’s noted here that emerald green has “depth and versatility when paired with other traditional hues…the ultimate staple for autumn/winter wardrobes…works well for statement jackets and accessories but has also enjoyed a revived popularity in suits”

emerald

Going left to right in the above picture: OK, statement jackets… Unless you’re totally comfortable carrying a man-purse and wearing green fur, avoid this look like the plague. Special man deserves a special girl. We want to see his date. Plaid overcoats with emerald green? YES! Bingo. Classic, worthy of investment, shows you have style and timelessness, and the grey fedora is just a sharp dressed kick in our pants. Don’t live in a cold environment? Go with a green in a [plaid] shirt. We live in plaid central up in New England, so you’re a winner, winner who gets one of our fabulous chicken dinners with plaid up here.

Now, let’s look at green suits. Small town ‘Merica might want to avoid this look because you’re likely to get called a leprechaun (amongst other things). Big city? Go big or go home is our daily motto. If you’re ballsy enough to wear it and feel like you rock it, truth is, you likely will. And who in Hell are we to say no to someone who feels like a rock star in what they’re wearing. Just know, we’re still likely going to comment, “He’s got big balls,” when you walk by us on the street, and that just means we respect your chutzpah.

None of this working for you? Check out our cute little friend Mark Sanchez on GQ’s September cover a few years back. He is clearly a fashion forward man ahead of his time with the emerald color. And that smile… guys, a great smile can melt a girl…Even you can pull off this classic-ness – color and smile. Really, if you can’t pull of a basic green shirt with a smile, you’re beyond all our help.

mark-salling-gq-september-2011-1

2. Tartan: As noted, this look is “Reminiscent of private school uniforms.” This look is also trend-on for women; as we noted in our female Fall fashion post, this look conjures up school girl fantasies for some men. For the record, that boat somehow doesn’t float both ways. Maybe it’s the teacher in me…However, this look for men came forth in Fall Fashion Week in “bold suits featuring this classic design.” This season suggests going beyond the classic plaids into more bold colors, and “A bright tartan blazer will work nicely as a focal point for your outfits, so accessorise accordingly with minimal pieces that will sustain a youthful silhouette.” Yes, men, please do maintain a somewhat youthful silhouette; the dad bod doesn’t really work – the fact that this was ever a thing is just…wrong. We don’t necessarily need a 6 pack, although those are quite lovely, but some semblance of anything but a beer gut is OK. And let’s talk accessories. Min-A-Mal if you are wearing plaid. A little of a good thing is all you need.

See Eddie Redmayne’s simple black tie, crisp white shirt, and classic black shoes? It all comes together to make these bold tartan suits work. We approve, and so will your gal if she isn’t a total wench.

And ANY guy can rock a plaid shirt or a plaid scarf (maybe not three scarves like A$AP Rocky)… an-ny guy. You do not need to be Ryan Gosling (but it does help from a women’s perspective.

And lastly, unless you’re Scottish, do not pretend a kilt is your thing. We’ll only say it takes a seriously awesome man to pull off a kilt. From someone who owns her own clan’s plaid, some believe to wear a plaid that isn’t of your clan is in poor taste, at best – and bad luck, at worst. So wear at your own risk, gentlemen. And if you are Scottish, God bless your beautiful self; we know what you true Scotsmen have underneath, and it just makes us smile.

3. Floral Print: This is a curious one for men, in our feminine minds. If you’re going to go bold here, you better damn well own it. The bold jacket or pants?? Um… we’re not sold, but like we’ve stated before, if you’re bold enough to think you can rock it, you likely will. Cue AC/DC’s Big Balls.

floral

The floral shirts? They can totally work, when toned down with an overcoat or blazer in a darker or even coordinating color, but you can quickly dip into fashion faux pas here. There’s a reason we didn’t find many male celebrities in floral. Maybe stick to a floral tie to show your softer side – which, for the record, women like. And see Leo below? He’s paired this lovely floral tie with a very simple plaid. And it works.

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4. Shawl Neck Cardigans: This is dubbed as the “ultimate staple piece for classic winter dressing.” It can add a “novel touch” to a basic t-sheet and combo, and it can “ground your look giving a bit of added character.” In the street style looks we saw, it looked best paired with turtlenecks and other knits. Don’t live in cold weather? Unless you’re living in the 7th rung of Tartarus, it even gets cool at night in Florida – we’ve both lived there and know this – so find a nice light knit one to layer over your boring t-shirt. And unless you’re looking to attract a much older woman, go for a fitted look.

Looking from left to right in the picture below: No… you look like you just crawled out of bed and threw on your robe. Sorry, unless one of us is crawling out of bed with you, we don’t want this as an everyday look, it’s sloppy. Knits & cabled turtleneck underneath (two inside images), yes – classically sharp looks. We fail to see a shawl neck cardi in the middle picture – that’s just bad photography or someone is seriously inept at pointing out the difference between a blazer and a sweater – the print looks like a scarf to us. And the guy on the right? Sure, throw your sweater over what looks like a hoodie, but ditch the bloody cigarette.

shawl-neck

The image below of Miguel’s vintage shawl neck cardi totally works, and here’s why: He’s thrown it over a basic, boring tee, so it adds serious panache. It’s a hunting dog pheasant themed sweater… come on, you don’t have to be so frickin’ serious all the time. We love it, and if you were wearing it, someone is gonna love you.

miguel-wearing-vintage-cowichan-shawl-collar-hunting-dog-pheasant-theme-shawl-collar-sweater

5. Fur: This is a tough one… While Jean is a fur fan on females, Paige is not. However, we both agree on the male fur thing. We’re quite simply going to agree with this statement if you choose to wear: “less is more and a relaxed approach is essential.” We’ve both traveled far and wide, especially in ski country where furs can abound on the rich and wannabe famous. If you’re in fur, especially a full length one, we think you’re one of two things: trying to look like a famous star, aka you’re a wannabe, or you’re just a serious asshole.

celebrity-fur-coats-fashion-trend

We’re serious here… Kanye wears fur. You wanna link yourself with any aspect of him – other  than his bank account?? But even then, we’ve heard he’s kinda broke. Our hearts bleed for his financial crisis. 

6. Shearling: Ever popular, and far less controversial than fur, is the classic shearling jacket. While it’s “trend on” right now – remember, fashion is a fickle bitch – it’s also a classic staple in colder climates. Seen everywhere this season in browns and tans, lighter tones abounded, as well. We totally approve of this concept! “Try incorporating the trend with pieces that feature denim for a classic look that is incredibly versatile, particularly for casual looks.” Amen. We just don’t think anything is wrong with any of this. Drape on one of these, and trust me, a girl will drape herself on your arm.

shearling

Even in a completely casual denim jacket, as the luscious David Beckham is adorning below, shearling just works, and not just because it’s Becks. Besides, it’s one of the few things where if you’re girl decides to throw on a shearling jacket, you won’t look like you are some weirdo twin couple.

david-beckham-acne-jam-shearling-collar-denim-jacket-2-787x1024

7. Statement Jackets: We have mixed feelings about this, just as we do about statement t-shirts. We’ll agree with the following, “The trick to pulling off this trend is to commit to your look…” and pairing it with basic staple pieces. Don’t try to go all matchy matchy with colors and such. Just throw it on over a t-shirt and jeans, but commit, baby. Commit to it. Only dip into this realm if you absolutely love the jacket or the statement on the jacket, given that statement jackets are considered “the street’s playful take on sartorial propaganda.” I mean, the picture on the far right almost made us spit out our drinks for so many reasons. Besides, we’re not totally sure any guy really wants to walk around with a jacket that states “world’s smallest” & “tiny” on any part of his body…what was the guy in the middle thinking? We didn’t get past the word tiny.

statement-jackets

And look here at these dippy statement jackets. Think before you wear, gentlemen. Think.

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Moral of the statement jacket story? Be oh so careful here…

8. Novelty Sweaters: It’s not just for your Ugly Sweater Christmas Party this season! There’s a whole lot to just flat out own in the world of men’s (and women’s) street style this fall, and this trend fits that bill. “The key to choosing novelty sweaters is to adapt it to your personal style.” Indeed, we all have a playful side, and this trend lends itself to finding that playful side, which women adore. Unless you are flat out whacky from the word go, grey bases will tone down and ground this look. If you want to dip your toes in this trend, we approve. Just make it something that fits your personality, or your gal – or any girl, for that matter – will simply stare at you with that look. We know you know what we’re talking about here. We actually approve of all of the looks below except the green snot-blowing whatever it is on the far right. We both own several novelty sweaters, and get lots of compliments. As always, own the look, darlings. Just own it, whatever it is you’re wearing.

novelty-sweaters

We’ll bring back Miguel’s shawl neck cardigan here – bingo, he nailed two trends in one cool sweater. Who knows. Maybe he is someone who pheasant hunts with his dogs. Maybe it’s time you actually went vintage clothes shopping with some female in your life, huh?

miguel-wearing-vintage-cowichan-shawl-collar-hunting-dog-pheasant-theme-shawl-collar-sweater

9. Felt Fedoras: It seems like updating the grandpa trend is a thing for you fellas this season, and the fedora doesn’t disappoint. It is dubbed “a subtle nod to old-school dressing.” We’ll translate that for you fashion defunct: We’re running out of ideas, so we’re updating the classics. Some things have never gone out of style – and there’s a reason for that. Our grandparents had it right, after all. So did Indiana…

tod-fed

Even if you pull out your grandfather’s fedora, it’ll be amazing because it has meaning to you, and you’re gonna pull it off like a champ. And in this case, who gives a rat’s ass about an updated look. If you want the updated look, though, we can dig that, too. We like the colors, although the fella in the middle looks a wee bit like Santa stole Mrs. Claus’ hat and went on a drunken vacation. We prefer the structured look, thinking the floppy hat thing is a bit sloppy looking. Grandpa would agree with us, too.

felt-fedoras

And if you show up with good tea and a fedora like Ian here… well, you had us at good tea. 

ian-somerhalder-fedora-picture

10. Statement Gloves: We’re not talking about OJ’s or Micheal’s statement gloves here – although, we were immensely humored that these are the few images that come up when searching celebrities wearing statement gloves. 

OK, so here’s the thing. We live through cold-ass winters. Like it can dip to actual temps of negative 34 degrees cold-ass. Screw adding in a wind chill to that, which there often is one. That’s when we ladies are sending your ass out in your fedora for some good tea if we forgot to stock up for this round of a Polar Vortex. And if we send you out, guess what, you’re gonna want some gloves. Even the toughest of tough guys isn’t dumb enough to go out in that weather without gloves. So why not make them look good. Go leather for a sharp, refined look; the article we read said leather was retro. Please! Tell us when leather ever went out? Again, fashion, you are one fickle bitch. It also calls knitted and woolen gloves “playful.” How cute. Where we live, a smart guy has woolen or fleece lined leather gloves, and depending on whatever round of Polar Vortex we’re in, these are sometimes underneath knitted woolen mitten…You can treat the good leather with waterproofing, and the wool/fleece keeps you warm. Screw looks when you’re living in a world that is that frickin’ cold. Warm is what’s sexy at that point.

Alas, we do recognize not all of you live in the arctic tundra, so here’s some ideas to play with. We even love the bright colors and patterns! And here is some sound advice, “No matter how you adopt this trend [bahahaha – it’s no trend in cold climate], keep in mind what you are dressing for, and nominate a glove choice suitable for the occasion.”

gloves

And let us end this whole look into fashion with this note: If you ever come out of the house looking like this guy below thinking you’re in style, please know you’ve likely turned some girl to the other side. He’s nailed the statement jacket, the novelty sweater, and the statement Where’s Waldo glove thing, though. Oh, and nice cheek & collarbone contouring. This below is the exact reason we did not touch male runway fashion.

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GENTLEMEN: What looks are you already rockin’ this season? LADIES: What looks fo you like to see men? Let us know in the comments!

thumbnail credit, All 5-tiled credits, GQ cover credit, Eddie Redmayne’s blue suit credit & red suit credit, Ryan Gosling & A$AP Rocky credits, Sam Heughan creditGerard Butler credit, Leo DeCaprio credit, Miguel creditKayne credit, David Beckham credit, just married jacket set credit, Indiana Jones credit, Ian  Somerhalder credit, OJ credit, Michael Jackson credit, male runway model credit

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